Altruism in the workplace

Altruism is the response to empathy. Indirect to business goals, altruism creates the trust and communication bridges needed in teams for success.

Empathy is used a lot in the workforce today. What is empathy without altruism?

Empathy: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Altruism: the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others.

Empathy without Altruism

I have met individuals to whom altruism is a myth in the realm of unicorns. To these individuals, empathy is manipulating the situation to their end to favor their immediate outcome. It’s a surface-level response to which they show empathy, but they fail to act on it.

This is akin to learning to tango without feeling the music; the steps are memorized and mechanical, and no passion is there that defines the dance.

While this may work in the interim, in the long term, it fails.

An individual led through empathy understands that the manager hears and sees them. However, they will still feel the manager is not there for them. There needs to be more connection when empathizing with a team’s needs.

In this situation, the manager uses empathetic responses while driving business objectives to success for their validation from more senior management. Empathy is a mannerism or conditioned response. This is where altruism comes in.

Empathy with Altruism

Scrum was introduced to check in and connect with the team. In this remote age, it's used to hear what the team did on the weekend, where they're at and challenged in their current work, and what can be done to help get them past obstacles. Mechanically, it is possible to go through the motions; people are seen and heard — or are they?

As a manager, altruism helps the individuals on your team drive for higher levels of performance, innovation, and connection.

Example of the product owner working remotely with a sick child

Sita is one of my star product owners. She arrives at our daily scrum late one day, and I can tell something is up. Her camera is switched off. Typically, she is on time, the camera is on, her face is smiling, and her manner is engaging. Today, she apologizes for the lack of a visual check-in and relays how her son had been up all night with a fever and that she had not had the time to get herself ready for work.

I ask her to hold back after the group signs off the call. I am aware, as her manager, that she has no more sick/personal days available and that the week prior, she had been unwell, probably from the same sickness.

We talk for 10 minutes. I asked her if she was ok, how her son was doing now, whether she had anyone to support her, whether there was someplace she needed to be, and if she had a personal/work conflict that she couldn't mention on the group call. I also offer to find additional work-related resource help should she need it.

I am not inviting her to a rant fest or a sob story. During these ten minutes, I aim for her to be in the driver's seat and control what she is doing today. Given the circumstance, I actively get her to engage with her options and what she can and can't do.

• With me alone, she may turn on her camera. I intend to see her physical stance melt from her rigid state with her breathing more relaxed. As a human being, she is in a calmer state to make decisions.
• I intend to fact-check her guilt cycle (for example, in her role as Mom of a sick child, PO with a deadline, and colleague with a day full of meetings, deliverables, or responsibilities). As a human being, she is not reactive or reacting.
• I help her fact-check on any victim stories she may be fostering (She does not feel that her work keeps her from being a good mom, a perceived deliverable having a hard vs. rolling deadline, definition of done, perception of how others see her). She is not wasting precious energy on a thought spiral.

By the end of the 10 minutes, she is calm. She is in control. She owns the challenge that is today. I will continue checking in on her via Slack until her child returns to school. This interaction takes me, at most, an hour of my week. I am not concerned about how I make up for the time, nor am I concerned about how it affects my deliverables. As our connection grows — she will need less of me over time but will continue to check in or reach out when life gets complicated. The framework and foundation are there. She will start asking those questions of herself or others as she pays it forward through mastery.

The concept of doing something for others without an ulterior motive, especially in the workplace, is foreign and connected more to the cultural works of charity or Dana.

Yet, as a manager, you're in a position where the altruism you provide can come in the form of assisting people being unblocked by their bias, opening avenues for people and projects to grow, and helping people to grow in their careers. It is vital to empower people through coaching rather than feeding them the answer to their problems. Ultimately, their success may never relate directly to your success metrics — but the relationships you build will grow and contribute to a connected and trustful workplace.

Sita is in the driver's seat and feels supported and comfortable driving forward, knowing I am nearby sitting shotgun with her.

Altruism is the intuitive response to empathizing with a situation. There is no direct correlation to successful business or strategic goals. Still, your connection with your colleagues and team creates the trust and communication bridges that build great products and success. This vital ingredient of an empathetic workplace can not be measured.